Some days its just hard.
Tired of housework and laundry and grocery store and cleaning a really old house with thousand year old dirt in it that seems to come back the next day.
Tired of feeling ashamed because the Vet says "You need to do this treatment for your dogs", and I have to say "I can't afford it." And I feel really crummy...
Tired of working to get my second business going and not seeing results.
Tired of being afraid and anxious.
Tired of feeling sorry for myself.....
Just tired of all of it. Just feeling thirsty and tired like I've been walking a dusty dirty road for a long time...
So I go sit on the porch, and put my arm around my Cali dogs neck and bury my face in her fur that smells, like good dirt and grass, and musky dog smell, and listen to her breathe and feel her warm.
I feel her breath on my face and I look through her eyes at the top of the trees blowing the leaves and branches rattle, I lift my nose and I smell the rain coming on the wind and feel the dampness on my skin.
I'm listening to the wind and hearing the rain fall on the top of the tin garden decoration drumming and drops pour from the leaves and run down the rain chain and the smell of wet concrete fills my nose.
And my Cali buries her head in my chest and I'm in the minute not thinking of all the things making me tired just being being the rain and the breeze and the dog and feeling of heaviness lifting from my back and shoulders and my heart feels a little lighter.
How do you quench your thirst?
With the love of a good dog
with the the simpleness of the rain
with accepting you can't change some things they just are what they are
with being grateful and wanting what you have right there in your life