Thursday, August 25, 2011

Who's 11?

I really hate to exercise. I have a blue bike a nice one and couldn't remember why I never rode it so I took it out one evening and rode it to a friends house for dinner. When I got home I was trying to get my leg over the bar in the middle and fell over on the grass.
 Of course I only have avg. length legs and I did have about 3 glasses of wine but it jogged my memory of why I didn't ride it in 10 years. I decided I wanted a new bike for my birthday so I got on the internet and started looking. I wanted one kinda like when I was a kid with a groovy basket, a bell, bright colors, and no gears. I don't get the gears thing. I only rode a 10-speed because it was cool not because I needed all those gears. And foot brakes. Not hand brakes. I just can't get used to the sudden pitch forward of hand brakes, hello front flip over the handlebars...

I found some bikes called cruisers and there she was, it was a "AAAAAAHHHHHH" cue the angelic orchestra music moment. I looked up where they sold them in OKC. I called Larry and asked if we could go look at them and he said sure. So we all pile in the car on his lunch break and mosey down to the store. There she is. They take her down and I wobble around the parking lot. It is a little adjustment to having the different handlebars, it has only 3 gears, and foot brakes but not a huge deal. Im so excited.  Then I look at the price. HOLY MOSES and part the red sea theres no way we are buying this bike! It cost more than my wedding ring AND engagment ring. I gathered those boys up and said thanks but no thanks.

I did want a bike really bad. I would talk about riding around to all the little art festivals, to my friend Jennifers house over in Mesta Park, with COnor around the lake. I live in a beautiful neighborhood near all the fun parts of downtown and it would be fun to bike to stuff. But I resigned myself I'd have to find something else. I looked and looked but couldn't find exactly what I wanted. It was a bummer....

Cue to about four months later. We are sitting in the living room and Larry just jumps up out of his chair and says get up we have to go somewhere. I said where? He says just come on. So we all jump up and get in the car and head towards a old area called Automobile Alley. We get out and I see all these people walking to this little area set up for music with tents and stuff so I think we are going there, nope. Then I see the new Hideaway Pizza are we going there? Nope. He says in here so we go in this door and we are in the bike store. I still don't have a clue. I said what are we doing in here are you getting a part for your bike? Conor grabs my arm "No Mommy we are getting YOUR NEW BIKE!" 

Now it sinks in. All the whispering and sly glances. All the can I tell her what she's getting can I give her a hints from COnor. The remark about "I paid off your birthday present but you have to spend a little so your can take it to Florida." I thought it was a new car stereo or something. Maybe a IPad. Certainly not a bike.

Its her! Its the gypsy. The ultimate colorful crazy most beautiful bike in the world. I asked the guy how I would fit a wine rack on there and he laughed and said we can fix you up. THEY HAVE COOLER BAGS FOR WINE FOR BIKES?!

I have just got the best gift ever ever ever! My boys paying on this layaway every week so I could have my dream bike...I would have cried if I hadn't been so thrilled I was hopping up and down...


In front of THE WOMB art gallery
 COnor says Mom you looked like you didnt know whether to hit us or hug us. I jump on and ride down the sidewalk. 3 guys walk out of a building and are looking at me and smiling , I yell my new bike! as I ride by, they all laugh and clap. I ride over to the little festival and push my bike around. We put on funny mustaches. I take my picture with my new bike in front of the WOMB art gallery. Im so happy happy happy!

We put it in the Honda and have to ride really slow home with it hanging out of the back and Conor holding it in a death grip.


 I bring it in and take all these pictures of its fresh, no scratches, even smells new sweetness.

 Custom paint job, daisies my favorite flower.

Water in the basket ready to go. The perfect leather seat so comy and the hand grips match, ahhhhhh.

Yes I did take it for a spin, its maiden voyage. Yes it was splendid. I took it out on Sunday around 7am and rode for about an hour while it was cool. I was glad I had glasses on because of the little gnats. I was also glad my mouth was shut when I hit the cloud of them. Because moments earlier I caught myself grinning. Grinning from ear to ear, grinning to beat the band.  And humming the bicycle song by Queen....

Feeling my little tassels whipping back in the breeze, cruising along the wheels bouncing and whirring.

 Im not 50, Im 11 again...

All i need is the yorkie in the basket and wizard of oz music...

Beautiful and comfortable...

Monday, August 15, 2011

TP, Kleenex, and a Grandma

Im down in the basement sorting laundry and my cell phone rings so I reach into my bra ( which doubles as a cell phone holder in case you didnt know that, and I prefer the left side) and see its coming from my own house.

Me: What is it COnor?

Him: Um Mom Im out of toilet paper.

Me: Theres some on the back of the toilet.

Him: No Im in the upstairs bathroom. In your room.

Me: COnor theres a box of Kleenex on the side table where the phone charger is get some of that Im busy.

Him: No Mom I can't I need you to bring me some paper.

Me: Conor Im busy use kleenex.

I hang up. It rings again and I ignore it. Again. He calls about 3 times I know its him. I answer and say "Seriously son you can get up and get the cordless phone that sitting next to the kleenex but you can't get kleenex? " Then I hang up.

ABout 2 or 3 minutes later the house phone rings. I ignore it thinking Conor will get it. Then it stops and my cell rings. Its my Mom.

Me: Hi Mom.

Her: Suzie where are you?

Me: Im in the basement why?

Her: Well your little boy called me and said he has an emergency upstairs and needs you!

Me: He what? He called you? He called because he wants me to get him toilet paper when all he has to do is walk two steps and get kleenex IM IN THE BASEMENT are you kidding me? Im going to kill him for freaking you out.

Her: Oh no don't be mad at him. He's just a little kid...

Me: Oh no he's gonna get some toilet paper alright. Bye Mom.

I go upstairs get the entire package of TP out of the pantry and take it upstairs. He is laughing but not after I toss every roll at him as he dodges them yelling "Mom Mom nooooooo." While I yell "Heres your emergency, and when you get done you call your Grandma and tell her your sorry for freaking her out!"

He was properly contrite. I had a very hard time not laughing at him after it all happened. Im annoyed and amused all at the same time. We have come a long way from yelling out the open door to calling "THE HELP" on the house phone.....

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Males and furniture and help a girl out....

Im on a flinging binge. So far I have 8 pairs of shoes, 6 throw peeyoes ( as Conor called them) , 6 shirts, a set of sheets, books, two dirty, stinky, 7 year old chairs, and a plaid ottoman with a rip the size and shape of California down the middle. I just get crazy and start moving stuff out its so FREEING!. I invited my brother Dave over to help me move furniture around and take the chairs to the curb and help Larr hang a ceiling fan in Conors room in exchange for a back wax and beer. Dave took the beer and is considering the back wax...

Anyway I was going to sneak Larrys gross chair out while he was at work but he beat me home. Heres the conversation.

Me: So you just move my comfy chair over for you, keep that ottoman and then we'll put the nice blue leather wing back in the man cave for me.

Him: (Using the sad face) But I like that chair.

Me: (Trying to use the ick factor)  I know but I have tried cleaning it with everything and its gross and smelly it needs to go. Seriously.

Him: (Using the man logic) But its broken into the shape of my body perfect.

Me: (Now resorting to man  logic) It is broken alright you need a crane to get out of it, it is so low down to the ground your butt is almost on the floor. COnors head doesn't even poke over the top its so broken.

Him:( Using but we have a history logic)  But its not old, its only a few years old you bought it off Craigs list when we moved here 2 years ago.

Me:  (Using the same) No I bought both the chairs from Linda at the Spa the first time we remodeled in 2002 and they were already 2 years old AND had a million people sit in them. The nice chair I bought on Craigs list 2 years ago. The one that is pretty and does not have the fabric worn off and does not always smell like a truck driver.

Him: (Using shame) So you dont care how I feel about MY CHAIR?

I consider this throwing down the gauntlet using his  FEELINGS on me.

Meanwhile Dave is watching this like a tennis match and waiting. He's a wise man he kept his mouth shut.

I finally realize I have to use the throwdown on him. I look at Dave. I look at Larry.

Me: ( I use the beat up look and voice) OK I will move the chair myself if you won't do it I will just do it myself.

No No we will do it. They move the chair and ottoman out. They also move one chair upstairs and a couch and a chair and ottoman downstairs and another chair into the man cave. They then drink beer and excuse themselves to the babyman cave upstairs to do the fan...

But not before I talk to them about what it would take to hang my new bike on the wall like a piece of art which I was just kidding about but they went for it like a duck after a junebug! I told them I was teasing so they ran away before I gave them something else to do.

So Im cleaning and I hear all this thumping on the porch its Conor moving the chair back in.

Me: What are you doing?

Him: Bringing this chair back in its my favorite chair.

Me: No its gross and its going away.

Him: No mom its going upstairs.

Me: Take it back to the curb RIGHT NOW!

I look out the window. He's sitting in the chair. I go out and he says he's never getting out of it because then nobody can take it. I make him come in and he sets at the window and says if anyone tries to get it he's gonna make them pay him 50.00. He then goes upstairs and tells his Dad he should just march down and tell me no we are keeping the chair and Larry said sorry we aren't your Mom is a force of nature and can't be controlled.

After all that he went out and turned both chairs over trying to hide them behind Daves car. I hope someone takes that chair tonite. I don't want to find it under the tree in the backyard with COnor sitting in it playing with his IPod.....

Thursday, August 11, 2011

The Best we can


reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of aperson or thing; confidence.
confident expectation of something; hope.
confidence in the certainty of future payment for propertyor goods received; credit: to sell merchandise on trust.
a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is mytrust.
the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.

Troubles all these troubles, troubles all around....thats a line from one of my favorite Jon Dee Graham songs. I was laying in bed this morning the storm woke me up but I couldn't go back to sleep because I was thinking so much about all the troubles. They were like clouds in my head, beloved people with cancer, family troubles, money troubles, sick babies, our pick up thats probably going to last a week if we are lucky...all rolling around clacking like a bag of marbles.

I was thinking thinking thinking how do you fix all this? Where do you start? And most of all how do you accept what you can't fix? I felt a stirring by my feet and looked down to see my little 16 year old Lilly cat coming up to me for pets. She was a grateful distraction. I thought of how trusting she is. She doesn't worry that there will be no food or water or enough love. She believes that when she comes to me I will give her that. She trusts me has faith in me, lives in this moment. 
As I stroked her soft fur a voice in my heart said "trust me".

 I almost laughed. Gods so easy. He just wants us to be like that little cat. Just believe that there is something more. Peace , love, faithful hearts, tomorrow will be here and it might rain or it might be sunny but tomorrow will come and we will walk through the day and be in the night and we may feel alone, but we are not because the loves all around us no matter what. Gods love that surpasseth all understanding. Tonight right now I am surrendering to that trust....

 As I drifted off I thought of the trust I have with Larry and Conor. I could hear Conor stirring in his room and feel Larrys warm arm against my  side and thought this really all I need. And its all good, and yes we are all doing the best we can and standing in trust together...

"It aint the winning it aint the losing its the going on beyond our choosin that makes us KINGS"

Jon Dee Graham